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fragileclara:

greybies:

who even came up with the word motherfucker in the first place?

oedipus

(Source: alanblooms, via llcrime-scenell)

posted 1 day ago with 126,772 notes  alanblooms)

crrocs:

stability:

people who add things like “this is so me” to popular text posts

image

haha! this is so me

(Source: stability, via humorking)

posted 1 week ago with 119,805 notes  stability)

(Source: kimagreggs, via humorking)

posted 1 week ago with 216,721 notes  kimagreggs)

dampsandwich:

Well “officer” if thats even your real name,

(via humorking)

posted 1 week ago with 383,512 notes  dampsandwich)

Satan: [appears]
Satan: You can have anything you wan--
Me: LANGUAGE.
Satan: What?
Me: GIVE ME EVERY LANGUAGE.
Satan: What the--?
Me: YOU SAID ANYTHING. GIVE ME EVERY LANGUAGE IN THE WORLD.
Satan: Wouldn't you rather have love or money?
Me: EVERY. LANGUAGE. MASTERY OF EVERY LANGUAGE. NOW.
posted 1 week ago with 197,193 notes  tennantstype40)

fagmobs:

precumming:

u have a butthole …… i have a tongue ….. interesting

image

he made her wet

(via humorking)

posted 1 week ago with 71,117 notes  precumming)

(Source: bestprankever, via greetings)

posted 1 week ago with 223,808 notes  harveyxspecter)

unplannedchild:

now i know where ill shop for school

(via plagal)

posted 2 weeks ago with 43,067 notes  unplannedchild)

taint3ed:

elionking:

taint3ed:

Being 4’11 is so hard sometimes, for real. 

Damn, this so true. I remember in 4th grade I couldn’t reach nothing

image

(via pizza)

posted 3 weeks ago with 46,133 notes  taint3ed)

epic4chan:

They’re both texting someone right now saying ‘some weird guy next to me is wearing the same thing as me.’

(via pizza)

posted 1 month ago with 524,241 notes  epic4chan)